Friday, July 23, 2004

"Lack of understanding"

Probably the biggest hurdle for a deaf person, or anyone with a commication difficulty.
But its true.
A reminder to a mate recently, as he had lost his voice, temporarily but never the less,
 he soon realised some of the difficulties that arise.
Doing the very things he takes for granted with difficulty soon puts in to a new perspective for them.

But, it goes, they get back to the "take for granted mode" far to easy, we all do,
 it is familiararity thats part of human nature.

The very simple truth in that is Its forgotten.
Yet for us its NOT forgotten.Its a 24 / 7 situation.

We ACTUALLY live with it.

Thats to easy forgotten by some of us, maybe alot of us.
But its human nature.

But its ALSO a lack of understanding.
If others understood that its 24 / 7...then they would understand it different.
Interesting is human nature, so we have to live with that, yet its interesting to try to understand.

Understanding is an important part of LIFE.

Take care.  : )

Wednesday, May 19, 2004


Ringing in the ears.. or bells, whistles, etc.. jet planes?

All these can be descricptions of tinnitus, depending on how it "sounds"
yet tinnitus is more common than we realise.

It can and does happen to anyone at ant time.
It happens for various reasons, and has different causes.

Do YOU suffer from tinnitus?

Well I do, and it can be annoying at times, yet the best but hardest way to deal with it .. to me, is to ignore it.
Hard as it may seem, it works.

If you dont suffer from it, it may be hard to understand it.
It really is 24/7, all the time.. and worse at night, when trying to sleep.
Silence is deafning.

Does it just effect deaf people.. no.

I know of several friends who are not deaf, that suffer from it.
One of them, he is a couple of years older than me, has had it since he was a boy.
He says it was really hard back then to cope with it, and he really though we all had it.

I didnt get it till was 25. and I found it hard to deal with mainly because I am already deaf and struggle a bit, so this dam noise inside my head didnt help. : (

So in a way it has made my hearing worse.

So what can I do about it?
Nothing it seems, so I just ignore it.

In fact its only when I actually stop and think.. its gone.. that it starts again. : /
Like a reminder...

So best to not think about it.
I would be intrigued as to how many of you that read this do have tinnitus.

If you do suffer from it, and wish to post a comment that would be great.

I hope many of you dont suffer it. ;^)

Take care.

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

The question to ask....

Well something has certainly opened my eyes.
I have a question... what would be best?

Deaf from birth?
Lose hearing at say any age from 15 upwards?

HHm.. think that over seriously before you

Why am I asking you this?
Maybe most of you are "hearing" and some of
you are "deaf".. Ive no idea but....

I met someone a few years ago, when I was at
southampton university, having tests done,
regarding having a cochlea implant...

He was in is late 20s..and he told me his story,
one new year was drunk and merry as most of
people in the world are as they welcome the
new year...
Got home, proper drunk.. fell down the stairs,
banged his head, maybe knocked himself out,
and... in the morning, he woke to..

Silence...and probably a bad hangover too.

How would you react to that?
How would that really impact your life?
How would you cope?

A scary prospect I would say.

Im glad to say I thought he coped dam well with
After having the implant he conitinued with his
ambition of teaching kids.
That is what he does, he is a teacher in a
mainstream school.
Il not foget him or the warmth from him.
And big respect to the man for not letting it
defeat him.

I was humbled by some of the people there who had
these implants and their stories, most of them
were adults who lost hearing, and they all had
different stories and tales to tell.
Some were just kids, who all looked so happy
with WHO they were.
Yet so charmingly nice and talkative.

I learnt from each of them, but I learnt more
about myself than anyone.
I think both myself and my mum, who came with
me for support, and to learn with me all about
the implants, were moved.

I learnt to be happy with what I have more than
before, why?
Because I never knew any different.
they opened my eyes..

Now years later the same thought has opened
my eyes once more.. Why?
I have seen on a few forums related to deafness,
the panic, and confusion, and fear of the unknown
and these are people who have lost their hearing,
or have slowly lost more than they realise and are
to wear hearing aids...and are to rediscover hearing
but not knowing what to expect.

All perfectly natural given the circumstances.

So what is best?

To be born deaf, or to lose what you have?

Far more common to lose what you have than to be
born deaf I would think.

And that it could happen to "anyone" at any time.
Yes it could happen to YOU.

So I feel lucky..not to have lost what I dont know.
I feel lucky to have what I have.

Which brings me onto my next point.

If I had a Pound for every time some one ask me...

"Whats it like to be deaf?"

Id be rich.. ; )

The question to ask is not that..
The question to ask is not to me..
The question to ask is...

"Whats it like to hear?"
And the person to ask is....... yourself.

So ask yourself that..and be glad of the answers.

So did I have the implant? No...

Why not? Well I feel I am lucky to do as well
as I do and felt a child would be better desrving
than me for what they could give that child.
And they were young too.

And I didnt want to chance losing what I had.
Knowing if I lose what I have, and hearing aids
dont help, then I could re-apply to have an implant.
At £30,000 each..I rather the kids had them over me.

Till then il be happy. :^)

I am dissapointed no donations to the charity have
been made.
Think of the children.
And give them that chance.

Ask yourself "whats it like to hear?"

Thats what the children ask themselves...every day.

And we all should help them.

The charity needs you.
No donation is ever to small for the kids.
And every little mounts up.

Click on the banner.

Britner Foundation

And empower the children... give them the answers.

Wednesday, April 21, 2004


If you are a regular reader of the weblog you will by now know that i am a very proud dad and i love my kids more than anything in life.

There is simply nothing in life as rewarding as having the love of your children and
being a proud parent.
The sheer pride and the joy in the heart that you feel when with your newborn first child..(or children in this case) is unbelievable...never to be repeated again.
It takes your breath away.
Makes you cry.

Its a moment thats locked inside your heart and mind... never to fade. : )

And today Micheal Green experienced what i just described.

And todays post is to wholeheartedly congratulate Micheal and his wife on the safe
arrival of healthy (and no doubt beautiful) twins.

A girl and a boy.. and like the good english gent to be, he lets his sister into the
world first.. ; )

Micheal is the owner and creator of the great "the how to" forum.
If you really want to learn "how to" market, or many other things that you may learn
then why not check it out.. and while there post a congrats post. ; )

Just Click here to check out this great forum, and post if you wish, have no fear from posting, as everyone is treated with the respect that you treat others.

Note the simple rules for posting.. they are displayed for you to see.

Take care and see you there..


P.s... Micheal.. dont come down from the clouds for as long as possible. ; )

P.p.s Looking forward to seeing pictures of your twins.. : )

Saturday, April 10, 2004

I hope this link will work.. : )

As i mentioned in earlier post i have wish to support and help deaf kids to
improve their lives, and i have great respect for the charity you see below..

Scott Brittner a father of two deaf children, and a great man who
has inspired me.
He had to raise the money needed to buy his two precious kids hearing
aids..and he did it too.. $10,000... alot of money.

What a sad situation where the parents have to raise the money themselves.

I have great respect for them doing that, but its sad the government can "waste"
money in other ways, which often leave you sctratching your head in disbelief
yet ignore the lives of these children.. and their futures.

They deserve better than that.

So its left to the real peoople .. who care, the families and friends to do the best
we can to give these children the help and support they so richly deserve,
and the general public who without much of the help would not
be possible.

Every donation will directly benefit these children in need of help and support
and also the families of these children.
Every penny goes to helping these children have what most of us take for granted.

The chance to hear the birds sing in the mornings, the rustle of the leaves in the
autumn as they play in the parks, the rumble of the thunder in late afternoons
of overcast skies, and the laughter of others, and the softly spoken words of love
from their families and friends.
The words of widsom of their grandparents.

The very things many take for granted... we are all guilty of that.. even me..
and i am deaf.

We are not donating money just for the hearing aids, we are donating for the
joys and hope it brings to each child.. the feeling of pride they feel when they
can hear the words of love and encouragement from others.

The light hearted feelings hearing the birds sing brings, or the calmness of the
mind when hearing the waves break on the shore.
Or the tenderness of the "its ok" that mum says when they fall onto their knees
in the park.

Not only are your donations giving them the chance to hear, but also the chance to
"feel" and thats priceless.

Remember the time you hear the birds sing, the waves break on the shore, the calmness of mums soothing words.. the "feelings" they gave you.
How much were them feelings really worth?

I could not put a price on that myself... but its worth more than i can give.

But together we can all do our best to help and support these in need.

Lets all maike a difference in the lives of these children all over the world.
And lets start today.

Buy clicking on the link below, and donating and supporting this chartiy
you enrich a childs life beyond expectations.

Go ahead please make a difference..
your heart will "hear" these kids say "thank you"..

Britner Foundation

Take care,


Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Happy birthday son....

I love you son.. 11 already !!

And as you are in france on a school trip, (bonjour)
we will miss you on your day. : (
I miss you and will think of you all day.
But i hope you are enjoying it.

11 years since you changed my life forever.
Im so proud of you jacob.. i love you so much.
You smiled at dad on the day you were born, and that
filled my heart with sunshine.

A day never to be forgotten.
Got a tear in my eye now.. ; )
It was such a experience and such a feeling
of overwhelming love and pride.

Il never forget that u poooed on me..
And having no other top.. taking it off, and holding
you close to my chest and walking round the ward
showing you to did i feel proud.

And i still do, and always will.
Love you from bottom of my heart son..

Happy Birthday.

Love always Dad.. x

Tuesday, February 03, 2004

Offline... for a little while...

Due to my circumstances, i will be offline for a while.
But i will be back, and hope to make a few post over the
time i am offline, whenever i get the chance to make a post
or use a computer, either on a friends or in the library.

I hope you have enjoyed this weblog so far.
I hope that i can keep this weblog going for these kids.

I hope when i can to be able to put a donation link for the
charity i hope to help.

I want to help the kids as much as i can, and i hope you will all join me in making a difference in their lives.

I feel that its only right to help those that need it, and i hope
this weblog can make the difference to the futures of these

I ask you all .. will you help to help these kids?

Can you make a difference to them?

YES.. together we can all enrich the lives of these kids..
Help them to hear the laughter, help them to hear the words
of love from those around them.
Help them to hear their own voices.
And to hear the birds singing.

All the little things you take for granted.

Together lets make the world a louder place for these children.
Lets give them what they deserve.
And that is the chance to live as normal as possible.

It hardly seems like yesterday that i was a lad struggling to
cope with the problems these children face in life.. but
at least i had the opportunities these children dont have.

There is so much money in the world, that there is no
reason for these kids to not have the equipment they need.

The uk can be proud of the fact that they gave me the
equipment i needed.

I think it says an awful lot that the government can ignore the
plight of those children in need.
In a world of of possesions and greed.. its a bloody shame.

If the government cant help these kids, then its down to us all
to help them.

In a world where there are so many millionaires and wealthy
people that waste more than a child needs for a hearing aid
on possesions it defies belief.

I hope we can ALL make the difference thats needed for these

Will you all join me?

I hope you all find it in your hearts to help them.

If it makes a difference to one child it will all be worthwhile.

Till next time.. take care.

Saturday, January 31, 2004

Do you like this weblog.. what i think....and hope from this.

This weblog has been great to do, and has helped to share things
that i feel and think about.

Things that are worth sharing, and at times its good to get
something off your chest.
To clear any negativity by turning into a positive outcome.

To be honest life has not been as great as i would like it, but
hey thats up to me to change it.
In fact its started.

I would like to share an honest thought and request with you
all who read this.

I am in a awkward situation.
I will put forward the goal and aim of this weblog,
and then my current situation.

Something bothers me, what?
I recently found out that alot of deaf kids in the usa do not get
the equipment they need, ie hearing aids etc.. due to parents having to pay for these from their own pockets.

Disturbing indeed, as some of this equipment is not cheap,
digital hearing aids, i think there are a few types.

Now when i was young, im in the uk.. i had hearing aids from
the nhs.
I had the most powerful behind ear type that they could give
me, how old was i when i got that?

Two.. oh and yes i remember it.. wouldn't u?
It is great that i got that at two years old.
The young start meant i didnt have too much to catch up on.
I did actually start mainstream school, with the kids of my age
and i never fell behind.
We learn from those around us.
So my speach and communication is good.. as "normal"
whatever that is?

Would i be the same had i not got the hearing aid so young,
and not been able to attend school with the right age group?
Or even in mainstream school at all?

Makes me wonder.

And how sad that these kids dont always get that opportunity.
Dam shame.

And if i be honest from my point of veiw, deafness is the
forgotten disability.
I dont mean that in any bad way, or that everyone ignores it.

But that it has a lower profile and lower level of importance with regards to other sense losses.
In my opinion.

Sad that any loss is happening. Full stop.

So what to do about it.
Well i know what i would like to do about it.
I know that a charity foundation will be starting for these kids
and their familes.

So i would like to utilise this weblog to help them.
I will get a link for the account for this charity and have it on
this weblog..(if i am allowed).

Their aim is to raise $500,000 by 2005.
This money will go to these kids in the usa.

I would like to suggest that it would be blooody great if this
weblog could raise say £50,000 for them by 2005, and to carry on raising for them.
Could it be done?

Who knows.
Id like to try.

But first, a slight problem.
This computer is not mine.
I borrowed it.

So i am in procees of trying to get a new tower sorted out.
I may only have few days on here.
But i hope to stay online and continue this and more.

I have to raise the money quickly.
If anyone wants to donate any money to keep me online and
this weblog going continuously, then i would be very grateful.

If i dont get the tower as quickly as i need it, there may be a
few days break in this weblog.

If theres a break, i will put up a link for donations for these kids
as soon as i am back.

For now if anyone would like to donate towards the tower.. : ) Thank you so much.

I hope to not have a break, and to get raising for these kids
they are our future.

With the help of your donations and offers these kids can have the hearing world at their feets.

Take care.

Friday, January 30, 2004

Happy birthday son..i love you.

Nine years ago today, my youngest son Keaton came into our lives.

Happy birthday Keaton. : )
I am so proud of you.
I love you so much.

I feel very tearful, as both my sons have been absolutely great during these hard times.
The love of my sons has given me strength at the times i felt
weak and vulnerable.

The love of my sons has given me joy, they light up my heart.
I love them both with all my heart.

I am so proud of them, and so proud to be their dad.
I will never forget helping deliver them at birth, the most profound moments of my life.
Cried buckets of tears on them two very special days.

Nothing can prepare you for that.

If i never succeed at anything other than being a great dad to my boys...then i will be proud to have done what matters the most.

If your kids still love you when they grow up, then that says you have done well.

To often people expect their kids to love them when they are
grown up.
Sadly it does not work that way.
As kids they feel parents can do no wrong.

As adults they see you for who you are.
I hope they grow to love me for being me, as well as their dad.

To hear them say "I love you dad" is the biggest pleasure
in my life.
And im proud they can tell me that.

How lucky i am to have the love of two beatuiful sons.

I am very proud.

Happy birthday Keaton.

I love you.

Dad. x

Thursday, January 29, 2004

The power of the internet to change lives.

Welcome to all, and thank you.

Has the internet changed you life?
Will it change your life?

As for me, yes it has in many ways, and i am glad. : )
And it is still changing my life.

Many many moons ago....while snuggled up in the warmth
of my mums tummy something happened that shaped me.

Rubella... fortunately it doesnt happen now.

As a consequence of this i am deaf.
Would i have it any other way? No.
Why not?
Something had to be wrong, and as any doctor will tell you, anything could have happened, with respect to all other sufferers of rubella, who have it worse than me.

I aint got a bad deal out of it. : )
And it was meant to be that i am deaf.

And being deaf makes me me, what we lack, we make up for in many ways, and everything has its advantages.
All our faults and disadvantages create new advantages.
Its up to us to recognise the advantages, if we cant,
then its not a disadvantage in the first place.
Lipreading has sooo many advantages.. ; )

If you need proof.. next time your at the bar and theres a few of the opposite sex eyeing you up, talking to each other about you.. you think you could work out which of them likes you.. ; )

Clouds and silver linings spring to mind.. oh dear the girls will cover their mouths with their hands now.. ooops. : )

As i grew up, the phone was a no no.
Then.. bang.. mobiles.. great i can text friends, family. Wow.
I am now more into the hearing world, though i was never really out of it in the first place.. thanks to mum, and learning from those around me.

My deafness is only a problem for those who dont know me,
for those who let it be a problem.

It will now seem very obvious why and how the internet has already changed my life.
Email is the phone to me now.
Online i am NOT deaf.. if that makes sense.

We now live in two parellel worlds, online and offline.
Together they make the world a much smaller place.

Will the internet continue to change my life?... you bet.

I have dreams, and the internet is the way to for me
to realise those dreams.

I have goals, the internet will help me reach them goals.

One of those goals is to reach out and touch others.
The internet makes that possible, and easier to do.
Others have reached out and touched me.

If you read this, and stop taking your hearing for granted
so much, as with all our senses, i have already touched lives. : )

How does the internet change your life?
What can you do with the internet to change your life?
Or the lives of others.

Take care.

Rob. ; )